Falling for Flats

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Or in some cases falling flat in Fall flats. Last week we looked at finding the right colours to wear next to our face. The one great thing about shoes is that they are worn on the farthest body part from your face so colour it up people. Wear a great pair of red shoes on a day when you are feeling grey/blue or don those patterned pumps to proclaim to the world “I may have to wear these boring clothes for work but my feet still represent.” This season is flaunting the flat. Once again I bring you back to the woeful tales of my fashion past and in the spirit of Halloween and all things scary I shall reference Silence of the Lambs. We first covet what we see every day and I really wanted a pair of Roman sandals. Everyone was wearing them with everything last summer. Those of you who know me know I am . . . ahem . . . .frugal. I don’t go in for trendy items because often they are here and gone before you have them out of the box. Some trends, however, must be indulged and I was off to the shoe store. The first pair I tried on zipped up the back and I quickly unzipped them and placed them back in the box and slid them under the bench. Next pair same deal. A quick google later and I learned that there are no plastic surgeons who will enhance your ankles. There are no padded ankle socks, no ankle shaping foundation garments other than compression hose. You see, I have thin ankles. The straps of those sandals swam around my ankles creating a visual law of attraction all the way down my leg to my ankles.

Carmen, my long time friend’s first comment to me in college from behind me on the stairs was “how do you hold yourself up on those teeny little ankles??” friend for life material right there folks. To my voluptuously calfed brethren who may be thinking “who gives a flip for those with small ankles” this advice goes for you as well. Fashion is all smoke and mirrors people and these shoes were a tight, unforgiving spotlight on my itty bitty ankles bravely balancing my otherwise normal sized legs. Likewise if your calf is only slightly larger than your calf you may not want a giant ribbon around it and a flower on the side creating width. Seems to be there is a common thread to these what not to wear type articles and that is don’t wear what is trendy if it doesn’t make you look good. Life is too short to wear ill fitting, bad tempered clothing.

Back to the fall flat we go. Sturdy ankles require sturdy shoes. You can wear those sexy spin offs from the traditional loafer with confidence and you will rock those ballet flats. For those of you who are like me dangerously tempting the laws of physics with your thin ankles stay with a pointed toe and a slim heel and only slip into a ballet flat if you are actually at dance class. The good news is that all feet look good after a pedicure and in your fluffy bedroom slippers.

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