Realism and Actualities

Welcome gentle readers to this weeks “Be Yourself, Often” Blog and happy December! This is a time as we move ahead to the the busy chaotic scurrying of Christmas, parties, gift buying and all sorts of family and social events.

A time for potential chaos perhaps and yet a time to reflect on what actually is important. Realism defines as what is the reality of the moment and what are the skills and assets that I have to contribute. This is not as much a time of giving, but a wonderful and blessed month of reflection. A time to ascertain what is important in your heart and are the goals and objectives and values in line with the real you. There will be periods of much hypocrisy and much covered up joviality and then the world turns in January. This my friends is a time to look around and take a fearless moral inventory of what you bring to the equation. What do you give as it relates to yourself and how is that translated as an end result? Important here to note that that end result may not be known to you and as such becomes on of Faith and Belief. I can almost 100% promise you that whatever you do has a ripple effect. Ever had someone smile at you? What is your first instinctive response but to smile back. That then places you in a more positive frame of mind. We all know that the negatives and converse is true and the downers and negatives will often make the negatives of the moment more amplified. Heres a hint my gentle readers, avoid the negatives and watch and learn as that can be you and there is always some negative in any encounter and challenge. It would be naive to state otherwise. However my friend, what you do with that challenge is what will define the outcomes of said encounter.

Actualities in society at this time of year may be antithetical to the realisms and as such there is a very high level of expectation for goodwill to man, smile at everything and feel the moments and wish a happy holiday season. That isnt always the case and one must look at why some of the positive feelings happen. The culture of purchasing and gift giving may be linked to positively lighting up dopamine in the pleasure reward system. But as a caveat this may create discord as the recipient may not be as enamoured by the offering as you were. This is statements of expectations and this may lead to resentments. And thats even before the post holiday blues.

Want to feel the realities? Then I suggest to put aside the pre conceived notions of the season and look to the real reason and Faith and Belief that comes with Christmas. What does it mean? What does it mean to you? What do you want? There are so many beautiful lights, trimmings and wrappings… so maybe just to look at it with the wonderment of a child and mindfulness in the moment. Its not all going to be positive and perfect, but the attitude you have and expectations will define the altitude of pleasure and love and enjoyment that can be attained.

To see with those eyes of innocence, is truly to be yourself, often.


— Dr Joel Lamoure   December 2011

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